Enderborn
by Desert Monk
Summary: After a beating, Naruto meets Kyuubi, she gives him a bloodline never seen before in the ninja world. FIRST STORY WITH THAT PLOT Insane/Funny/smart/strong Naruto, Pairings NarutoxShionxfemKyuubix?
1. Chapter 1

**Enderborn**

**Author's Notes : Hello to all my readers, I DON'T OWN A THING OUUUUUIIIIIIIINNNNNNN (**cries like a baby**). Ooookay back to the subject this fanfic will be one of the first with my idea, their will be certain elements from minecraft, Naruto will be slightly or fully insane at times and he will have Shion (she will be slightly OC cuz I'm making her a girl with shinobi training SERIOUSLY WHAT KIND OF IDIOT RELIES ON ONLY THEIR POWERS AGAINST A DEMON WITHOUT HAVING THE PROPER TRAINING TO DEFEND THEMSELVES) and fem Kyuubi (megami).**

**Chapter 1**

It was October tenth, the night of the seventh annual Kyuubi Festival and the seventh birthday of a young blond boy, and also the worst day of his life. You see, while this night was all festivities, their was something hidden behind all that joy, and that was fear.

Humans are creatures who fear, they fear what they don't understand, that fear breeds hatred and that hatred is taken out on the subject of said fears.

Naruto Uzumaki was a cheerfull boy, or was he? That was his mask, his disguise, he made himself seen in public as a happy-go-lucky moron which he was not, he just used that mask to make the villagers less fearfull of him while he was infact a very intelligent and observant boy, he was very mature for his age, a life filled with hatred will do that to anyone. He learned long ago that the villagers were blind, blinded by fear of which he never knew the source.

He lived in an orphange (if you could call it that from his point of view), he was barely fed, his clothes were tattered and he slept in the basement. Said orphanage with all it's 'wisdom' thought that he was mature enough at age FIVE to survive alone so they litterally kicked him out, he lived on the street for a year befor he was given an appartement by that nice old man with the funny red hat (The third Hokage).

It has been a year now since he recieved his appartement, it wasn't anything amazing, it was in fact old and dirty and in the poor part of town.

Now he could be seen running as fast as his little legs could carry him, a mob of roughly thirty civilians along with half a dozen of ninjas were hot on his heals, in fact the only reason he was able to outrun them for 2 hours was because of his small size which gave him the advantage of hiding and escapingfrom small spaces, and his ungodly stamina that kept him going.

Unfortunatly, he turned a corner were he came face to face with a brick wall, he knew they would find him now, and when they did the pain will begin, they will drop all their hatred on his puny little body.

And so it began, for what felt like almost an eternity, he was beaten, stabbed, slashed and finally as a finishing touch, burned by multiple fire justsus at once which sent himinto unconsciousness.

The villagers saw this and seperated seeing as the 'Demon brat' had his annual punishment.

***IN NARUTO'S MINDSCAPE***

The Kyuubi no Kitsune, the great Queen of Bijuus, was for the first time in her life worried, she saw the walls of her host's mindscape cracking which ment that the boy's mind was breaking and that he was becoming insane. That didn't sit well with her and she was confused as to why was his mind breaking, wasn't he her host? Wasn't he treated as a hero like her sealer the Yondaime wanted? Now that she thought about it, she never did saw his memories, what if something bad happened to him in his early years to cause this? Oh how she was right.

Naruto appratrf in front of the cage, nothing was wrong with him except for one thing that made the giant fox apprehensive, the boy's eyes, they were dead, meaning that the blond lost the will to live. Kyuubi was very worried, the boy was insane and his mind was broken, she couldn't have that.

"**Greetings kit" **Naruto just looked at the fox.

**"I wish we could have met under different circumstances, kit, do you know who I am?"** asked the Kyuubi, Naruto suddendly gained a full blown and painfull looking grin.

"Seing as you are a giant ass fox with 1 2 3...9 tails I ca deduce one thing, YOU ARE MY GRANDMA" Yelled the blond, said giant ass fox just sweatdropped.

"Alright, alright you're the Kyuubi aren't you? Seeing as I did not shake hands or have a cup of coffee with the Shinigami I can assume that I am alive, that this is my mind and that you are sealed in me, huhh...so that's why they call me Kyuubi brat... it's all clear noe" Needless to say, the fox was awed by the blond's statemets, she hadn't even said anything and he already figured it out 'WOW' was all she could think.

**"Correct human, I see that you are far smarter than you let on, before we get down to buisness, I have a favour to askof you"**

"SHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT"

**"Ooookay, may I see your memories, I want to know whta caused your current state of mind"**

"Oh you know, it was nothing, a walk, a festival, bumping int people, being insulted THEN beaten, yup it's the normal everyday joy of the villagers" said the blond his voice dripping with sarcasm.

Kyuubi was to say the least, shocked, but she needed confirmation, so she concentrated and a tendril of chakra shot from Naruto's head into hers signifying the memory transfer. When she was done, she was shaking in rage, her tails were hitting the bars furiously trying to destroy them, she wanted nothing more than to get out AND SEND THOSE MOTHERFUCKERS TO DINE IN HELL.

**"THOSE UNGRATEFULL BASTARDS, ABUSING A CHILD NO OLDER THAN SEVEN YEARS OLD, OH I AM ANGRY, SCRATCH THAT, I. AM. SCORNED. LET ME OUT KIT, THOSE FUCKERS WILL PAY BIG TIME"**

"Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaah NOPE"

**"LET ME OUT AND THEY WILL SUFFER FOR YOU"**

"SHUT UP CALM YOURSELF" the fox visibly calmed down.

**"Forgive me kit, it's just even in Hell, child abusing is a big NO...look kit I want to help you so I shall give you a bloodline"**

"Whatever"

**"It will change your body into that of an Enderman, they are creatures of the night who have the ability to transport willingly from place to place without limits, they are also called the fear demons because of their creepiness and habit to terrorize people teehee. Any way, you will gain physical aspects meaning that you will grow extremmely taller and skinnier and your strengh will recieve a huge boost, there are other abilities that will be revealed in a later time"**

"Whatever"

**"They really broke you didn't they?"**

"Whatever"

**"HEY STOP THAT"**

"Whatever"

**"AAAAAAAAAAARGGGHH that's it! I will apply the modifications prepare for a world of pain!"**

"Whatever" Kyuubi just kicked him out of the mindscape out of frustration.

Naruto woke up in the alley in a dried pool of his blood, his grin was still plastered on his face, he was about to get up when red chakra began to course through his body, he felt pain, and by pain he means the pain that could make a regular man scream until he breaks every glass object in the area. The blond however took all that with an insane laugh which got reduced into giggles after about an hour of the process.

When the chakra disappeared, the blond looked at his body, he was now 5'2 feet tall which was VERY tall for a seven year old, his skin had turned a tanner shade and his eyes were purple now, he saw that his clothes were close to ripping out of his body so he went home (his injuries were healed by the process of transformation into an enderman), he got dressed in a larger pair of clothing, took whatever stuff he could find useful around his appartement and put them in a backpack which swung on his back.

The blond disappeared in a purple poof of smoke never to be seen for a few years in the leaf village.

***TIMESKIP: 5 YEARS LATER***

Konohagakure was a peacefull village, everyone was going about their day and the shinobi and kunoichi were doing their job protecting their homes and families.

One man was bitter today, it was the Third Hokage, you see while everybody else was preparing for the Kyuubi Festival, he was looking at a picture of him next to his surrogate grandson, he shed a tear, it's been five years now, nobody could comfirm if the boy was dead or not although the villagers were just happy that they could sleep peacefully at night now knowing that the 'Kyuubi brat' won't sneak into their homes and tear their heads off.

The Sandaime Sarutobi Hiruzen was angered when he recieved knews of the blond's disappearance, furious when the villagers threw a week long party which he halted and sent the ones who organized it to Ibiki to 'have fun' with them.

'I am deeply sorry Minato, I failed you and your son, and the village that you died for ignores your sacrifice...Kushina I wish you were here, you wouldn't have let the villagers have their way with the boy'

Meanwhile a figure was walking to the village gates, said figure was a GIANT of a man due to his 6'5 feet height, he was however very skinny but you could see his muscles flex with each movement. The man wore a black cloak that conceiled his appearance, except for the purple eyes that shone under his hood. The strangest thing was that their was a small reddish fox sleeping around his neck.

"Halt state your name and buisness in the hidden leaf" Yelled a guard.

"Kotetsu, Izumo MY BROS forgot me already (Sniff) I'm hurt, my heart is bleeding" said the figure grabbing his chest and doing a dramatic pause making the guards sweatdrop but then widen their eyes as they recognized the voice.

"Naruto? is that you" asked Izumo recognising the voice as his little surrogate brother's.

"In the flesh, or maybe not hihihihihi" the blond giggled insanely.

"Bro what happened to you?" asked now Kotetsu

"A lot of things actually, long story short, I'm insane, I'm back and ready to fuck shit up UZUMAKI STYLE" yelled Nauto.

"Well you gotta tell us the details over some ramen sometime okay?" proposed Izumo to which the blond nodded.

"Yeah yeah just don't fall asleep here, now I'll go give jiji a heart attack PEACE OUT POTATOS" he disappeared in purple smoke, the guards were shocked in the beginnig then just sweatdropped at his attitude and then snickered immagining the Third's face when his surrogate grandson appears before him after 5 years of abscence.

In the Hokage tower, the Sandaime Sarutobi Hiruzen, The Kami no Shinobi and the man nicknamed 'The Professor' for his large knowledge of the ninja arts was getting a beat down from his worst enemy, the thing that never dies, the thing that could make Bijuus go crying to Hell and the thing that he dreaded most PAPERWORK.

'Stay calm don't kill anybody. Stay calm don't kill anybody. Stay calm don't kill anybody...' he repeated in his head likea mantra. So imagine his surprise when a giant figure appeared in his office in a poof of purple smoke.

"Who are you stranger and what are you doing in my office?" asked the Hokage moving into a defensive stance as did the ANBU guards in the room.

"(Sniff sniff) How could you I thought we had something special? (sniff). Anyway HI JIJI"

Said old man couldn't move, he recognized the voice and no one but his grandson Konohamaru called him that. But it couldn't be HIM could it?

"N-Naruto? Is that really you?" asked the leader with shaking hands and a hopefull face.

"Yeah it's me old man WASSSSSSSSSUPP? Look I'm sorry for my disappearance, I just needed to train and have some time alone" said Naruto removing his hood and making the fox yip happily and jump into the blond's arms waiting to be petted which he was.

"Why?" was the only thing that the old man could ask.

The blond just sighed and told his surrogate grandfather to seal the room and get the ANBU out. After doing that Naruto stood up, walked into a corner and charged what looked like purple chakra into a seal on the wall which the Sandaime never saw before.

"Somebody's been evesdropping on ya old man" the blond answered the unasked question.

The Hokage just thought 'Danzo' then he turned back his attention to the blond waiting for an explanation.

"To answer you questions jiji let me start from the beginning. Five years ago I was attacke, I was beaten for about two hours before I lot conciousness, that was the day I not only lost my mind and will to live, but also met my tenant who gave me a bloodline. Before you freak out, let me tell you that she is very nice and the attack on Konoha 12 years ago wasn't her fault, but that is a story for another time. Now before you ask this bloodline turned me into a half demon, I became what is known as an Enderman, a creature of darkness who can cause fears and nightmares to it's victims and teleport from place to place instantly, I also recieved greater physical strengh and a VERY tall posture as you can see. I trained to use that power for 4 years before something happened, I was walking through Demon Country when I heard of a young priestess that has the ability to see someone's death, they also said she was to be taken out of the local temple to got to Swamp Country and do a ritual that would destroy a demon known as Moryou at the cost of her own life. I met up with the girl saying I wanted to help her, at first she didn't trust me and tried to attack me but I subdued her, she then told me that if I was to protect her I WILL die, I just laughed saying I don't give two shits about living or dieing. We travelled together and I told her of my plan, I wanted her to use her powers to try and subdue the demon while I absorb it into myself, that way she won't die and the demon would be gone for good. We arrived to the country were we entered a cave, we were then confronted by five warriors who wanted Moryou free, we defeated them all but one of them managed to free the demon. We fought him for some time until I used my bloodline powerso absorb the demon's dark chakra, but that somehow interfered with the seal causing Kyuubi to be free"

"WHAT?"

"Wait old man Kyuubi who's real name is Megami (goddess), although free has only one tail of power, she's in my arms now" the sandaime looked at the little fox who was purring at the blond's petting.

**"Yeah don't worry old man,I'm in good hands teehee, Naru-kun has 8 tails of my power currently but he can only control 3, pity" **said the fox shocking the old man and then she jumped on the blond's shoulder and nuzzeled her cheek with his.

"Naru-KUN?" questioned the old man with a smirk.

"ANYWAY, I spent a year mastering the demon's powers which became a new element, the darkness element, it's a far more potent version of the Nara's Shadow manipulation and here I am now let's PARTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY" yelled the blond earning a sweatdrop from the old man and a giggle from the fox.

"Hmm okay Naruto-kun but can you tell me about your skills?"

"THAT" the old man leaned on the desk "is a secret" he just facefaulted while Naruto continued giggling with Megami.

"Oookay moving on, Naruto would you like to join the leaf's shinobi forces"

**"HELL YEAH"** screamed both Naruto and Kyuubi.

"Alright but you will be a genin as I cannot name you directly as a chunin because I don't know your capabilities on the field, Naruto just pouted.

"Anyway, you will be attending team assignement at the academy tomorrow, Dismissed" said Hiruzen recieving a nod from the blond who then bowed and disappeared in a poof of purple smoke.

This was the beginning of the FUN for Naruto and HELL for the villagers.

**DONE! SOOOOOOOOOO? WHAT DID YA THINK? REVIEW PLEASE! I LOVE REVIEWS AND POTATOS, BUT MOSTLY REVIEWS :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Enderborn**

**A/N: I don't own Naruto, I am not a slaver after all. Hi guys I wanna thank all my reviewers and readers, writing a story then publishing it is hard work but you feel really proud seeing people saying it's great and they want more, I also really appreciate any advice or suggestion so I could write better.**

**What I really despise are disrespectfull people that would only review to insult the writer (coughcough3ch0coughcough).**

**chapter 2**

Naruto walked out of the Hokage Tower with Megami around his neck .

"Naru-kun it's a good thing you didn't tell him about everything, I mean he would have flipped if he knew your level of skill, even more than knowing me and Shion-chan are your mates"

"Hehehe yeah Megami-hime I am a genius" said the blond proudly while puffing up his chest only for the vixen to swat him with one of her tails.

"OUCH **sniff** that hurt megami-hime, why? I thought we had something WHY? Is hitting me going to satisfy your scorn? **sniff** I am so hurt?" Naruto made a dramatic scene while gripping his heart and mock crying and a cloud appeared only above him raining on his head. Kyuubi just swatted him with her tail but then she licked his cheek making the cloud disappear and a rainbow with flowers appear aroud them.

**"Why are you always such a drama-queen?"**

"Love you too Vixen-chan" Megami just blushed and licked him again, he proceeded to scratch her behind her ear making her purr.

They continued walking until they arrived to the academy, they passed through the gates and stood out of the door designated for them to enter but before they did.

"Sooo...normal, awesome or creepy entrance?" asked the blond, the fox just shrugged and said **"Umm creepy, just don't scare them too much".**

"Hehehe I'm a fear demon hime, it'll be a bitch to lower my badasserie and scary aura but I'll try, but if anyone of those brats mocks MY HEIGHT I'll feed them to Fluffy AND I WON'T FORGET THE TARTAR SAUCE THIS TIME" said the enderman earning a sweat drop from his compagnion, yeah Fluffy would be filled alright, not like she didn't eat a hundred bandits one time or anything, OH NOOOOOOOOO, Fluufy was in the fear demon's opinion the 'CUTEST AND MOST GOODEST' creature in the world. Naruto was very touchy about his height, it was usually people who said stuff like "Wow, how's the weather up their?" or "Were your parents giants or something?" that got to see the gates of hell first courtesy of Naruto...sigh...crazy bastard.

...

...

"Alright here goes NOTHIN'" said the blond disappearing into his own shadow.

Meanwhile in the classroom, one Umino Iruka was trying and failing to get the attention of the whole class, soo he just sighed, took a deep breath, grew his head three times it's size and yelled.

"FOR THE LOVE OF KAMI AND EVERY GOOD THING IN THIS WORLD SHUT THE (**Censured for readers under 1000 years old**) UP" Everybody did just that, some even pissed their pants at the KI emmited by their teacher.

"Okay now that I have your attention, we will be welcoming a last minute student in our class today, his name is-"

"WAIT what do you mean last minute, we all studied for 5 years in this academy, he should be with the first years!" Yelled an annoyed Kiba, Iruka just grew a tickmark at being interrupted.

"SHUT UP now as I was saying, the new student is-" he was again interrupted but this time as all the lights in the classroom seemed to turn off suddendly and insane laughter filled the air making all the civilian children and some of the clan heirs piss themselves.

Out of Iruka's shadow emerged a figure clad in black, it's head was hidden by a hood, he put an arm around the shocked teacher's shoulder and looked at the rest of the class, needless to say they were petrified, the two glowing purple orbs under his hood seemed to stare into their soul which made some people pass out.

Then instantly, the lights turned on and the laughter stopped making every person awake sigh in relief.

"Umm are you Naruto Uzumaki?" asked Iruka slightly scared of the newcomer.

"Let me answer your question with a question : Do you see a giant another giant ass guy dressed like a boogie man with a giant ass scythe who can cut you to peaces while yodeling and cutting potatoes in one hand?" answered the blond rappidly making Iruka slightly dizzy while he tried to understand everything.

"Well you don't, OF COURSE I AM NARUTO UZU-FUCKING-MAKI WHO ELSE WOULD I BE?" Now everyone was seriously questioning the boy's state of mind.

"sigh...Alright everyone this is your new comerade, make sure to treat him nicely 'and not to piss him off' Added Iruka as an afterthought "Now as for the teams, team 1 will be...team 7 will be Uchiha Sasuke, Haruno Sakura (**INSERT MAJOR BANSHEE SQUEAL FROM LOCAL PINK HAIRED MONCKEY**) and Inuzuka Kiba under Hatake Kakashi, team 8 will be Aburame Shino, Hyuuga Hinata and Kurama Yakumo under Yuuhi Kurenai, team 9 is still in circulation from last year and finally team 10 will be Akimichi Chouji, Nara Shikamaru and Yamanaka Ino (**INSERT INO BANGS HEAD ON TABLE**) that is all, your Jonin teachers will be here in an hour so-"

"Excuse me dolphin were do you think you're GOING? What about me?" Yelled Naruto while standing up making the nearby students stand away from him.

"Hn, you're such a maniac they figured you'd be better off duty" said Sasuke not looking at the blond while his fangirls shouted their agreements.

"Hmm? You say something?" responded the blond while he suddendly had on a facemask , his headband was covering his left eye and he was reading a certain orange book.

Near the memorial stone Kakashi Hatake raised a fist in the air while eyesmiling and shouting something about 'a soul being enlightened by his hipness'.

Back in the classroom, Sasuke was seething at the blond for his balant dismissal, Sakura looked ready to bash the maniac's head in and to bust everybody's ear drums in the village to defend her 'Sasuke-kun' when said maniac turned to her and gave her a shit eating grin scaring her to unconsciousness. The last Uchiha was then surprised at the creep's almost instantaneous change of attire, he was more shocked when said creep made all the new attire disappear while he was _blinking. _The only way to describe that guy was 'Da fuck?' with expressions similar to (O_o) or (O.O).

"Whatever you creep" continued Sasuke.

"Anyway Naruto you have been placed as support and backup for team 8" finished Iruka earning a nod and insane drin from the giant.

The chunin just sighed, picked up his stuff and left leaving everyone...with Naruto, their were collective shudders.

Kiba got up and advanced to the blond inspecting him "Hmph you don't look that strong you're just a nutcase"

"I'll have you know I am not a 'nutcase' I am a respectable insane young man who is desperatly searching for his mind, didn't you see my poster? Not cool dude it took me 6 hours and 10 buckets of glue to put them all over the village" retorted the blond making a scene and pulling a poster which said 'LOST BRAIN, IF FOUND RETURN TO NARUTO UZUMAKI' the oddest thing was that the brain had on a party hat and creepy smiley face.

Everybody just 'eeeeewed' while Naruto just laughed like a madman.

"You're disgusting you're really insane!" yelled Ino.

"And proud" continued Naruto.

"Well in any case I bet you don't know any jutsu!" taunted Kiba.

"What's a jutsu?" Everybody just looked at him surprised and shocked until Kiba laughed.

"HAHAHA...y-you don't know what's a HAHAHA...jutsu?"

"If I give you biscuit will you be a good boy and shut up?"

"What did you say?" asked Kiba angry.

"I said if I give you a biscuit will you shut up? Man why do I have the feeling that your dog is the brains of the operation?"

"SHUT UP YOU LOSER" Yelled the dog boy charging at Naruto but he only hit purple smoke when he jumped on the blond.

"Are you done making out with the ground?" asked a voice behind Kiba who was then lifted by his leg like a ragdoll.

"I have killed people for much less you know? they don't call me the 'Demon Butcher' for nothing" said the blonde holding up a black and purple scythe against his captive's neck.

Seeing as Kiba got the message, Naruto in a very comical fashion, tossed the dog boy over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes (a/n : I know I'm frustrating about potatoes so DEAL WITH IT :P)

Everybody cringed from Kiba's cold meeting with the floor and tried to move as far as possible from the crazy giant but before anybody could say a thing a group of jonin entered the classroom.

The first one was a bearded man with cigarette in his mouth, he had a green jonin flak jacket and black pants, he had a white sash tiedaround his hip with the symbol for fire. The second was what many men could describe as a godess of a woman, she had raven hair that cascaded down to her shoulders and exotic red eyes, she wore the strangest dress that seemed to be made out of bandages and stopped at he mid tighs. There was 6 other jonins with them.

"Team 10 meet me at the Akimichi barbecue restaurant: said the bearded man as he left with team 10 following close behind.

"Team 8 meet me at training ground 8 in 10 minutes" said the raven haired kunoichi leaving via shunshin.

Before the members of tem 8 could move, Naruto grabbed each one of them and they disappeared in a poof of purple smoke surprising everybody and leaving a seething emo king with his loyal subjects (a/n: pfffffft XD). Naruto and co appeared in the clearing in a cloud of purple smoke scaring the jonin.

"What was that?" asked Yakumo.

"Teleportation" Answered the blond making everybody gape at him.

"Anyway shall we move on to introductions? tell me your likes, dislikes, hobbies, dreams and skills" said the raven haired beauty recovering from her shock.

"Umm can you give us an example sensei?" asked Hinata.

"Yes I am Kurenai Yuhi, but you may call me Kurenai-sensei, my likes include reading, my friends, tea and genjutsu, my dislikes would be perverts, rapists and sexist men, my hobbies are reading, studying genjutsu and spending time with my friends, my skills revolve mainly around genjutsu and my weakness is taijutsu. My dream is personal, you're next" said Kurenai pointing at Hinata.

"My name is Hinata Hyuuga, my likes are my sister, cinnamon rolls and guardening, my dislikes are mainly arrogant people and the caged bird seal my family uses (Naruto looked intrigued at that piece of information, he would have to look it up), my hobbies are training in my family's taijutsu style and reading. My skills are taijutsu and my weakness is ninjutsu, my dream is to become a good clan head and change the way of the Hyuuga" Hinata was dressed in a purple battle kimono, she had short blue hair and lavender pupiless eyes as well as white skin, she had an aura of confidence but not arrogance, and kindness.

"Good now you" pointed the jonin at Yakumo.

"My name is Yakumo Kurama, my likes are genjutsu, dango and genjutsu, my dislikes are jerks and arrogant people, my hobbies would be painting and training. I am talented at genjutsu but weak when it comes to Taijutsu and ninjutsu due to my small reserves, my dream is to become a strong and respected kunoichi" said Yakumo confidently, she was a beautifull girl with porcelain white skin, golden eyes and long purple hair that reached to her mid back, she wore a red short sleeved shirt with mesh armor underneath and black skin tight pants, all in all she was a beauty and had an aura of playfullness and confidence.

"Alright now how about you" asked the genjutsu mistress pointing at Shino who puched his glasses up (a/n: Is it just me? or every anime dude with glasses make them go white reflecting the sun when he's about to talk?)

"I am Shino Aburame, my likes are bugs, my family and winter melon, my dislikes are those who harm bugs unnecessarely and pesticide, my hobbies are learning my family's hidden jutsu and collecting bugs for my hive. I am proficient in my family's hidden jutsu but my weakness lies in taijutsu and ninjutsu as I do not have enough chakra because of my kikai" said Shino in an emotionless tone, the Aburame, like every clan member wore the high colar trench coat and trademark sunglasses, he was pretty tall for his age standing at 5'3 feet and wore grey pants, his skin was pale and he had spiky black hair.

"Finally last but not least mister..." she trailed off not knowing his name as she was only informed that she would have one extra genin as support.

"Uzumaki, Naruto Uzumaki, (a/n:LISCENCE TO KILLLL) I like Megami-chan (at thatstatement the fox yipped and licked Naruto's cheek causing the other girls to shout 'KAWAII' mentally), Shion-chan, Fluffy-chan, scaring people and potatoes...mmm potatoes... I absolutely HATE cowards, rapists, perverts, child abusers, arrogant assholes with duck ass haircuts (the rest of the genin chuckled remembering Sasuke) and Fangirls 'THEY WOULD MAKE SNACKS FOR FLUFFY-CHAN', my hobbies are fighting like a maniac and scaring the shit out of everyone I see, I don't give two shits about what I do so I don't really have a purpose" Naruto then grinned like a maniac and discarded his coat showing his skinny but ripped and tall body, he wore a sleeveless black with purple stripes shirt and black and purple camo pants with combat boots. His hair was spiky and golden yellow with black stripes, his face was angular and masculine with three whisker marks on each cheek and almost gloing purple eyes. All the girls had to hide their blushes, even Kurenai but then a thought struck her.

"Naruto you didn't tell us about your skills" she said intrigued.

"Oh that look in the Bingo Book page 73" answered the blond. Kurenai opened her book and read out loud.

"Name : Naruto Uzumaki.

AKA : Demon Butcher, Scarecrow, The Enderman, The man from nowhere and everywhere

Rank : High A, low S (information is incomplete)

Skills (information incomplete):

Ninjutsu : 3

Genjutsu : 5

Taijutsu : 4

Kenjutsu : 5

Fuinjutsu : 4

Speed : 4

Strengh : 4

Intelligence : 4

Stamina : 5

Chakra reserves : 5

Chakra control : 2.5

Total : 45.5

Weapon of choosing : Scythe

Information : Extremely dangerous, has mastery over space-time techniques at a level that surpasses the Yondaime Hokage's, is rumored to leave some of his victims without any will to do anything and extremely scared, is called 'The Enderman' due to his ability to teleport from anywher to anyplace in a poof of purple smoke. Warning mentally unstable and said to be an insane killer, do not engage.

Bounty : 65 million ryo from Iwa and Kumo Dead or Alive, 70 million ryo from Oto Alive"

Needless to say by the time the genjutsu mistress was finished, everyone was sweating while Kurenai yelled "WHAT THE HELL? HOW ARE YOU A GENIN?"

"I dunno maybe cuz I haven't told my skills to Hokage-jiji, besides I'm insane so you guys can't guarantee that I won't chop my comerades to pieces just for the fun of it which I won't...damn prejudice"

"I have to report this to the Hokage, you are dismissed, come back here tomorrow at 6 am for your real genin test?"

"What do you mean real genin test Kurenai-sensei, wasn't that the graduation exam?" asked Hinata slightly worried.

"Oh that was just to weed out the hopeless, out of the 27 graduates only 9 will make it as genin, Ja ne" finished Kurenai with a smile then she left via shunshin.

The rest of the genin turned fearfully to Naruto who was whisteling innocently, they were scared, they never met someone like that.

"Umm so what happens now" asked Yakumo almost stuttering.

"Look I'll tell you this now, do NOT fear me as I said I hate cowards deeply, I am willing to cooperate with you and maybe even bond as friends. One more thing, never base your ideas on someone from other's brief observations, do it yourself. Understood?" said the blond to which the three nodded and smiled.

"Now then PEACE" finished the blond making two victory signs and disappearing in a purple poof of smoke. The rest just sweatdropped at his randomness and bid each other good bye.

Something told them that this would be the start of the strangest adventure of their lives.

**OMAKE : NARUTO'S AWESOME ENTRANCE**

From Iruka's shadow emerged a gigantic figure who began to sing.

"The enderman's back in town

people ain't gonna frown

they're gonna shit their pants

while... EVERYBODY DANCE NOW" shouted the blond, as soon as the words left his mouth, a disco ball appeared from the ceiling, colourfull lights shot everywhere and disco music played. None of the students knew why or how but their bodies suddendly moved on their own, they all got on the desks in perfect rythm and danced the same way : by putting there right hands finger extended high in the air then back down.

After about two minutes they stopped, as did the music and the lights, the disco ball just disappeared through the ceiling.

"Ooooooooookay, that was reaaaaally creepy I assume you are Naruto Uzumaki?" asked Iruka slightly scared from the newcomer.

"In the flesh teehee"

"Why did you do all that?" asked Iruka irked.

"Did what?"

"The lights, the dancing, the music, hell even the disco ball"

"So because I got out from your shadow at the moment when all this chaos broke out you blame me?"

"Yes"

"How prepostrous I DEMAND A LAWYER" the chunin just sweat dropped, he sighed then turned to everybody who were in corner, in the fetal position, sucking their thumb and saying things like "Takeshi is a good boy" or "Mommy, mommy is that you?" from Sasuke or "I can see the lighhht" from a random student and "Troublesome" from Shikamaru who was just sleeping.

"EVERYBODY GET BACK TO YOUR SEATS INCLUDING YOU UZUMAKI" Yelled Iruka making the entire class poof to their seats as if by magic.

**DOOOONE SORRY FOR THE DELAY I HAD MY FINAL EXAMS SEE YOU IN A WEEK! OH AND REMEMBER TO REVIEW NOT FLAME ! :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDD**

**Oh and about Yakumo, well their isn't much fanfictions with her in them online so I figured 'Hey why not?' and I wanna know who do you want to be Naruto third and maybe final girl (I'll add 2 if I get enough demands)**

**Tayuya**

**Fem Haku (if not I'll give her to Shino, he deserves love after all)**

**Yakumo**


	3. Chapter 3

**Enderborn**

**Author's Notes : YO YO WASSSSSSUP Y'ALL: I DON'T OWN NARUTO CUZ IF I OWNED HIM I'D BE THE RICHEST BASTARD IN THE COUNTRY YO. So what's up guys I have been meaning to tell you I LOVE YOU ALL PWWWEAAAAAAAASE MARRY ME **Ahem** Never mind****_. _****Anyways thx to all my reviewers, readers, followers, favoriters (Pfffffft XD) bla bla ON WITH THE STORY.**

**OOOOOOOH But before I forget We still have an issue : FOR THE FIRST AND LAST TIME I DID NOT TAKE ANY IDEAS FOR THIS STORY FROM ANYWHERE well perhaps I kinda inspired myself from 'The True Horror of Konoha' AWESOME FANFICTION and other places...**

**Well the winner or should I say winners of the poll for the fanfic are drum roll please (PTR PTR PTR PTR PTR PTR PTR TISSSSHH) TAYUYA AND POTATOES **Ahem** I MEAN FEM HAKU CONGRATS LADIES TELL US HOW ARE YOU FEELING (Author passes microphones to girls)**

**Haku : Umm ok I guess I should feel excited about being chosen as the main character's girl in the harem.**

**Tayuya: Excited...EXCITED? WHAT THE HELL? WHO GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO GIVE ME UP TO SOME COCK-SUCKING WANNABE PIMP? YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK ABOUT THAT? LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING YOU (BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP) AND YOUR MAMA'S A (BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP) AND THAT SON OF A (BEEEEEP) OF A FAGGOT MAIN CHARACTER CAN (BEEEP) HIMSELF FOR ALL I CARE.**

**DM (Desert Monk) : Are you sure? cuz here comes Naruto.**

**(Naruto appeared in a purple poof of smoke)**

**Naruto : Hey DM, my bud, my bro, you son of a (BEEEEP) How you been ? good? Alright good. PEACE POTATOES !**

**(Naruto disappears in a purple poof of smoke, Haku and Tayuya stared at the spot that he once occupied with deep blushes on their faces)**

**DM: Why is everybody insulting me or my family today?...sigh... Alright judging by your expressions I'd say you take back everything you said Tayuya?**

**Tayuya: Y-yeah I take back what I said about blondie but not about you or your mama.**

**(Author cries anime tears)**

**Haku : And did you see that little fox ? so KAWAII :3**

**Tayuya : I'm with you sister. YO DM START THE FUCKING STORY ALREADY.**

**Chapter 3**

The next morning found our favorite blond strolling the streets of Konoha, he had his 'FUCK YEA' grin on his face and Megami was around his neck like always. People gave him a wide berth to walk, they did not want to piss such a giant off, his posture was intimidating from the black cloak and hood to the twin glowing purple orbs under it.

'Heh who said that being loved is better than being feared?.' thought the blond.

**'Naru-kun...Are you saying that you don't prefer our love? tsk tsk Shion-chan will have to clean the pieces after I'm done with you.'** thought Megami in a dangerous tone.

'N-no o-of course not I cherish your and Shion-Hime's love above all else, you are the most beautiful, intelligent and kind women I know PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF POTATOES DON'T HURT ME'

Megami just sweat dropped and licked his cheek... Her mate was such an idiot sometimes, but she loves him for it.

Naruto then saw the only place he missed in his absence, it actually brought a very rare genuine smile to his face, it was a place where he could be treated with love and respect, it was...

Ichiraku Ramen...

His stomach growled at the thought of food, so he decided to go greet his surrogate sister and her old man. As he entered the stand, he saw that nobody except for the Ichiraku family was there, Teuchi was in the kitchen and Ayame was cleaning the counter. Sensing someone was there, the girl lifted her head up to meet the customer.

"Hello welcome to Ichiraku's Ramen Stand what can we serve you today?"

"Three of everything" was her answer, she dropped the note book she was holding, there was only one person who ordered as much food, but it couldn't be could it ?

"N-Naruto? Is that you?" She asked stuttering.

The giant took off his hood as a response showing his face, at first the girl was confused by the darker blond hair and purple eyes but it was his six distinct whisker marks that shattered her wall of doubt, she promptly leaped over the counter and hugged him fiercely snapping half his ribs and making him stumble backwards a little. When she let go he inhaled deeply almost feeling in heaven after that hug of torture, but his moment of joy was interrupted however by a HUGE pain in his ear, Ayame was pinching him painfully by the ear and had an angry face on.

"WHERE WERE YOU? DO YOU KNOW HOW WORRIED WE WERE? WE THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD! DEAD!" She yelled tears streaming down her eyes, the blond looked at her with a smile and hugged her, he apologized explaining to her that he was left for five years for training but she interrupted him again.

"DAD COME HERE YOUR FAVORITE CUSTOMER IS BACK! NARUTO-OTOUTO IS BACK!" They heard some utensils falling and ushered steps. An old man emerged from the kitchen with tears in his eyes as well, he grabbed the tall boy and crushed him in a bear hug.

"(sigh) hi old man" said the blond.

"N-Naruto! I can't believe it! After all these years! I was worried sick about you! This is incredible! We must celebrate your return! Order whatever you want ON THE HOUSE" yelled the weeping ramen chef then smiling at the blond who just grinned.

While Naruto waited for his order, he and Ayame talked, he told her about his travels and she laughed at some of his antics although she was saddened and angered that the village broke his mind. But the there was always small parts of the old Naruto left. When his order arrived, the blond inhaled 30 bowls while megami (who has been cuddled to death by the teenage girl due to her extremely high cuteness factor which got some chuckles from the blond) ate one bowl of Miso Ramen.

After they finished, the vixen jumped on her mate's shoulder and said mate did a back flip from his stool getting a giggle from Ayame. He then pulled out a brown sac and threw it on the counter it opened to reveal countless jewels and golden coins, Naruto could've sworn he saw the lights dim a little and the coins glow as well as an angel singing. **'DAFUQ?'** thought the fox.

"W-what is all that Naruto-kun?" asked the ramen girl awed. Her father was in a similar position except he had ryo signs in place of his eyes.

"That is for this round, when I was little, and a thank you for taking care of me all these years" said the blond with a smile and then vanished in a poof of purple smoke leaving the Ichiraku family crying from joy. He reappeared in front of the Hokage and Kurenai scaring the shit out of them.

"Naruto-kun please stop appearing so suddenly, you'll give me a heart attack in my old age."

"Awwww but old man where's the fun in using the door?" asked the blond with a pout. Elsewhere near a hot spring,a certain super pervert suddenly felt pride.

Back to the office, Kurenai told the Hokage about Naruto's status, even going as far as to show him his Bingo Book profile, needless to say, the old man almost swallowed his pipe and his jaw hit the ground creating spider cracks in the floor boards.

"YOU'RE THE ENDERMAN? WE HAVE BEEN TRYING TO RECRUIT YOU FOR YEARS! How? When? Where? What? Why?" asked the old man rapidly.

"I already told you how, when... I guess it was during those five years, where... well bitch it's everywhere, you know what and last but not least why...cuz I'm sexy and insane and you know it." (play 'I'm sexy and I know it' for about 10 seconds)

"Alright I will get back to you for calling me a bitch later but as of now could you tell me more about your abilities? especially the 'fear' thing and space-time jutsu" said the Sandaime puffing on his pipe.

"(sigh) alright old man now listen carefully, you too Kurenai-sempai (gesturing to Kurenai who nodded) as I told you before megami-hime here also known as the Kyuubi no Yoko has given me a bloodline 5 years ago when I lost my sanity that night, I became an enderman blah blah blah, I can transport any where I want blah blah blah OOOOH I almost forgot, the reason why my space-time ninjutsu is so powerful is because with my nature as an enderman, I have free access to the ender world, a pocket dimension that is said to be between heaven and hell,this dimension collects souls that according to the Shinigami cannot be judged due to having an equal amount of good and bad deeds, those souls become enderman and are under my command cuz I got there boss stuck in my gut-"

"you mean Kyuubi?" asked the red eyed jonin who has been growing more and more interested.

**"I'm right here Kurenai-san"** said the fox shocking the jonin.

"How?" asked the latter.

"Well if you let me finish you would know sempai, (Kurenai was ready to give the blond a good ol' Female Rightous Fury treatment) like I told jiji, I absorbed the demon Moryou about a year ago, this somehow interfered with the seal and threw Megami-hime out of the seal with a tail of power"

**"Meh it's not that bad, at least I can see the world now and do _whatever_ I want with my Naru-kun"** said the vixen nuzzling the blonde's cheek causing the jonin to mentally 'awww' and the Sandaime to have a small nosebleed.

"And how do you plan to do _that _you're a fox." stated the old man who had small traces of a blush on his cheeks as did Kurenai.

There was a poof of smoke and in the place of the fox was what could be described as a goddess (Hehe her name means 'goddess'), she was a young girl around 15 years old with a slim built, D cup breasts and hourglass figure, she had vibrant red hair and red slitted eyes, she wore a black kimono with orange foxes design on it. Needless to say the village saw a HUGE red fountain coming from the Hokage office. Said Hokage was currently unconscious from blood loss.

**"Hihihi happens every time doesn't it Naru-koi?"** asked the vixen leaning on her mate's arm who looked at her with a rare smile on his face.

"What can I say I am one of the luckiest men on earth to have such a beauty as my mate" said the blond earning a blush and kiss from the fox girl, they were about to make it into a full make out session but a cough interrupted them, they turned to see Kurenai standing there with a small blush.

"Your private life aside please, now Hokage-sama I was wondering what I would have to do about Naruto's status? I mean clearly he doesn't need a sensei because of his strength if the information on the Bingo Book is accurate" she asked the old man who had miraculously recovered.

"Ahem well yes... Naruto-kun will be your assistant, he will aid your students in the departments which you cannot teach like taijutsu" stated Sarutobi.

"AWWWW do I have to ? it's boring...(sigh) alright I'll do it BUT I want any difficult missions that involve killing...I still need to feed Fluffy-chan"

"Alright alright...but who is that Fluffy-chan you speak of" asked the Sandaime to which Kurenai gave a curious look"

**"That...is a secret tee hee"** giggled the fox at their facepalms.

"(sigh) you know what Naruto-kun FUCK THIS SHIT DISMISSED" yelled Sarutobi as he Karate chopped his desk and jumped out of the window screaming while terrorizing Kurenai and every ninja and civilian near the tower, Naruto and his mate just rolled around in laughter.

"Ooookay...that was anti-climatic anyway see you tomorrow" said the jonin.

"WAIT Kurenai-sempai, I have a great idea for the test tomorrow" yelled the blond grabbing her. They spent the rest of the afternoon planning what to do.

The next day we see the genin minus Naruto of team 8 in the training ground's clearing waiting for the missing two I MEAN THREE (sorry Megami-sama) missing members of their team. Their conversation was however interrupted by a purple poof of smoke followed by a white poof of smoke.

"HAHAHA I AM THE FASTEST MOTHAFUCKA ON EARTH" Proclaimed Naruto earning sweat drops from the rest of the team.

"Teleportation is not speed Naruto-san" stated Shino stoically while pushing up his shades making them go white from reflecting the sunlight.

"WHAT WAS THAT YA MOTHAFUCKA? And seriously do you HAVE to make your shades go white each time you make a smartass comment?" Naruto got in the Aburame's face.

"Yes" was the only response he got as he cried anime tears.

"Anyway now sempai and I thought about the test and I suggested to put you in an umbreacable genjutsu, to break it you will have to fulfill the test" before they could ask any questions, the blonde and the ravenette did some handsigns and yelled _Magen: Nightmare maze _making them go unconscious.

***IN THE GENJUTSU***

The three genin found themselves in a tropical forest, they were confused but a deep voice answered their unasked questions.

**"Welcome to the Maze of Nightmares, the only way out would be for each one of you to face their biggest fears then advance, pass this test and you shall recieve your prize" **They nodded their heads in understanding although they were quite scared.

They walked for about five minutes before some vines shot out of the ground keeping them in place, in front of them grew a lot of plants that the Aburame recognized as bug eating plants, he visibly tensed.

The plants then encircled him paralizing him in fear, they began eating some bugs off his body and he did the only thing he could think of he screamed surprising his teammates.

"NO NOT MY BUGS PLEASE, PLEASE SPARE THEM" the bug user was on the verge of crying.

"Get yourself together Shino! This is only a genjutsu!" yelled Yakumo.

"Shino-kun you have to fight them! I know you can do it!" continued Hinata making Shino snap out of his panic, he closed his eyes and took out a kunai cutting the vines before slicing each of the plants' mouths and the vines around Yakumo. Hinata did the same thing but by pouring chakra out of her tenketsus cutting them all.

"Thank you Hinata, Yakumo" he stated as the plants died revealing a green key, they took it and continued walking until they arrived to a giant rock gate, they unlocked it using the key and it opened allowing thm to continue.

What they saw then confused them further, they were no longer in the forest but in what appeared to be a dojo. Hinata instantly froze seeing her father and sister with the rest of the Hyuuga councilin front of them.

"Failure you are a disgrace to the clan, that is why me and the council decided to make your sister the future clan head while putting a modified Cage bird seal on you, then you shall be disowned of the Hyuuga clan never to be seen in the compound" stated Hiashi coldly while advancing with a brush intent on painting the seal on his daughter, Hinata just stood their tears filling her eyes. It was until both her teammates stood in front of her in a protective manner.

"Hyuuga-san I suggest you back off before I let my kikai feast on your chakra" said the Aburame coldly while summoning a black cloud of bugs around him.

"Yeah you ain't touching Hina-chan without passing through us first" stated Yakumo with equal coldness while she took out a painting of a red fire and did some hand signs making it come to life. The Hyuuga council was immediately burned and had their chakra sucked dry by the bugs making them disappear. Hinata mouthed a small 'thank you' to her teammates before getting in front of her father's face who still looked stoic as ever, she narrowed her eyes activating her Byakugan and ruched at him giving him a lot of chakra powered strikes making him disappear as well. The Hyuuga heiress then looked at her sister who was scared and her gaze softened, she hugged her and the latter hugged back making the sibling disappear and in it's place appeared a white key.

The trio the went to the end of the dojo were a small wooden door was located, they inserted the key and the door opened revealing a very dark space. They walked into said space and were shocked to see a very different yet similar person to Yugao, said person was a girl with brown skin and long ears, she had on a grinning oni mask, Yakumo instantly recognized her as ido, her dark self.

"H-how? I thought you were sealed in my mind never to return!" stuttered the brunette obviously paling.

**"HAHAHAHA you think you can keep me sealed forever? Now I shall defeat youand take over your body!" **declared the doppleganger.

"N-No I won't let you!" Yelled Yakumo trying to cast a genjutsu on her evil clone but to no avail, said clone took out a dagger and rushed at Yakumo who was frozen in fear, she was however halted in her attack courtesy of multiple jyuuken strikes from Hinata and a swarm bug attack from Shino.

"Yaku-chan you have to finish it! This is just an illusion!" yelled the bluenette.

"Yes Yakumo you have to face your fear" continued the Aburame.

Their words made her smile and she got up taking out a kunai, and with determenation in her eyes she lunged at her evil half killing it.

"Thank you Shino-kun, Hina-chan I owe you" said the Kurama softly while hugging them.

"You helped me as well as Hinata you do not owe us in any way" stated Shino earning a kiss on the cheek from Yakumo making him blush very faintly.

"Now let's get out of this maze...wait isn't there supposed to be a key" The trio looked around and true to Yakumo's words their was no key in sight, they only saw a large metal door in a corner of the room.

"Huh? There's something written on the door...let's see 'The Key is next to you'." read Yakumo.

"W-What does it mean the only thing next to me is...Shino..." trailed off Hinata understanding the meaning of the word.

"WHAT? WE HAVE TO SACRIFICE ONE OF US TO PASS? NO WAY!" yelled the Kurama heiress.

"The logical choice would be for me to stay here while you two pass" stated Shino.

"NO! no way we are NOT leaving anybody here it's or all of us or none of us" screamed Hinata.

**"Congratulations you have made the right choice"** boomed the same deep voice from earlier.

"Huh? What do you mean?" asked Yakumo confused.

**"The key to this test was not to sacrifice your teammates but to work with them, congratulations you may pass"** and with that the door opened in a blinding light to which the trio walked.

They opened their eyes to find themselves in the field of training ground 8, they looked up to the smiling and proud face of Kurenai and stupid grinning face of Naruto in an...err...military uniform.

"GOOD JOB MAGGOTS YOU JUST GOT PROMOTED 'WORTHLESS' TO 'LESS WORTHLESS'." yelled the blond making his head go big and making the rest sweat drop while the trio got tick marks on their heads.

"In Naruto's language that would mean good job the answer to the test was teamwork as it is very important in a shinobi's life, you have to be able to rely on someone else to have your back in case you need help, you are now officially part of team 8" said Kurenai with pride.

"GOOD NOW SEE YA TOMORROW 'LESS WORTHLESS' PEACE" yelled the blond disappearing.

**End**

**Now for each one of you who is wondering why I chose Haku instead of Yakumo well the answer is simple:**

**-Haku just like every other girl doesn't have family that we know of.**

**-I totally dig that pairing.**

**-She like all other girls have been rejected for something that wasn't of her control (Tayuya too I assume).**

**SEE YAAA POTATOES**


End file.
